There's Always One.

Last night, an apparent electrical short caused the train a few stops behind mine to go up in flames. Luckily, no passengers were onboard, and firefighters were able to put out the fire after the track electricity was turned off. Obviously, this caused major delays.

When my train actually arrived, the conductor stuck his head out to look at our large group standing on the platform and shouted back into the car “Raise your hand if you’re getting off at this stop.” He looked back out at us and said “Ok, I think we can fit all of you.” We crammed in there like sardines. I, for one, was stuck standing in a crowd of men that were about 6-foot and above, so needless to say, I had a lot of armpit in my face. In spite of the situation, most people were jovial, friendly and tolerant.

The conductor was very kind and felt bad for us and said “I’m really sorry for all of this folks. I know it was uncomfortable. I hope you have a nice night.”

The woman next to me screams out: “You stupid idiot! You are treating us like animals. We pay a lot of money to ride this train. You are a stupid idiot, and I cannot believe you did this to us! You can go to hell!”

There’s always at least one asshole in a crowd, isn’t there?

Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Conductor

This morning, half my train broke down in between Center City and West Philly. The conductor came through and asked us all to switch cars because they were disconnecting ours. People started getting all riled up and the conductor shouted, “Ok then, you can also just sit in this broke-down car all day!” and turned to me specifically and said “What in the hell is wrong with people?” Exactly.

She was far kinder than the conductor I encountered on Tuesday. Because it had snowed, all the express trains turned into local trains. When I got to 69th Street, four trains pulled up within 30 seconds of each other. I asked one of the conductors, “Excuse me, but which of these trains will be leaving first?” He said, “I’m pretty sure you were standing right here when they all pulled up. Which one did you see arrive first?” I pointed up at the train in front of me. “Riiiight. So, logic tells us that this one will leave first,” he condescendingly snipped back at me. I just put on a giant smile and said “Gee mister, thanks for the information.”